Tales of the Great Holt-Ysses - Part 4 "St. Maartin"
Aaaahhh....St. Maartin. Half French & half Dutch. This just means that the two countries wanted the island for themselves and after wars, treaties and a whole bunch of fuss the two decided to split it. Ok this is totally my take on history but what I think is the Dutch and French both strolled up there to the island, stuck their flag in the sand and said "mine". The natives on the island just stood around and smiled. I don't think they realized they had been taken over for like 100 years or something. I think they finally got the clue when the French and Dutch made them all slaves and then made them over-mine their one and only natural resource on the island (salt) until it ended up completely depleted. The French and Dutch then made a "humanitarian" decision to let the natives have the island back and let them have their "independence"....all of course as long as the Dutch could keep their banks there and the French could control the real estate. So then you have a bunch of "free" people without one single way of making money on the island and they still have to keep their silly Dutch and French names on the banks and landmarks. I knew the French were sorry but the Dutch? What the heck? What happened?
Ah but the St. Maartinians get the last laugh. You see rich and famous people have a desire to find out-of-the-way places and inhabit them so that they can do what they want without the press finding out. Like a closet only bigger. One day some rich and famous people in big honkin cruise boats "re-discovered" St. Maartin and decided that they should make all this island their little closet. A few resorts later and a few deals with some cruise lines and next thing you know hundreds of thousands of people make it by the tiny island of St. Maartin each year. Tourism is the only source of income for the island so these people tend to be a bit more accommodating than many of the other islands.
Amy and I went on an excursion here in St. Maartin. We did the Rhino riders. What? Yea Rhino riders. These are cool check out link http://www.atlantisadventures.com/tour_info.php?site=12&tour=147
Here's how the excursion went: We got on a bus and a very informative driver told us the history of St. Maartin and how the French and Dutch did their best to "civilize" the island. It's from this driver that my version of history was formed. He was rather tour guide-ish with the way he led the tour but when he talked about how the French and Dutch basically raped the land you could sense a little bit of spite in there. Ok sorry, back to the rhinos. So we get to the place where we the rhinos are and we get a quick intro and rules of safety briefing by some guy who was built like a wall and had a great Russian accent. He was one of those guys that acted as the tour guide and complaint department...if you know what I mean?!? We get our briefing, life jackets and snorkel gear and then we head out on our boats. We got behind an older couple and for some reason they didn't believe the tour guide when he said the boats were like rhinos (tough and virtually untippable). So they decided they would drive their boat much slower than the guide. The rule was that we all go in a single line behind the guide and no one was allowed to pass. The older couple was right behind the guide followed by us. This drove me crazy considering the guide had to continuously slow down and circle while he waited for the rest of us. We finally got to our destination which was a little bay with black sand (volcanic) and shaped in semi-circular pattern. Because of it's shape they called it "Happy Bay"....I assume because it resembled a smile. We stop and our guide points out some people on the beach completely nude. He told us there was nothing to see there and he was right. Some old wrinkly guy and his mirror image wife...yuck! Some people have no shame! So we snorkel on the other side of the bay away from the "nudes" as the tour guide called them and unfortunately we don't see too many fish. We enjoyed the water and that's all that mattered. We get back on our rhinos and oh yea...Brian gets in front this time. We literally took flight this time. Those Rhino boats will fly ladies and gentlemen. We did a bunch of sharp turns and hit wakes and got some air. It was great! The old couple are probably still on the water looking for the rest of us. Ok, so we get back, say goodbye to the rhino's and get back on the bus and head for the ship. Oh wait, I forgot to mention that the guy the owned the dock and attached bar and grill was a New Yorker from Vegas who just "fell in love with the area". My take on this was that he was probably and ex mob guy or in the witness protection program. He just had that old mob look...you know what I mean?
So when we got back on the boat we showered and OF COURSE ate! It had been after all three or four hours and we were at least two meals down from our 10 times a day eating quota! This was our favorite excursion and we would recommend it to anybody. St. Maartin is a lovely island and the people seemed nice. If you go there, do the Rhinos and say hello to my new friend Vinny from Vegas!
Next blog will be from beautiful St. Lucia.......I think or maybe St. John. I'll look on the itinerary and get back with you.
Brian
Ah but the St. Maartinians get the last laugh. You see rich and famous people have a desire to find out-of-the-way places and inhabit them so that they can do what they want without the press finding out. Like a closet only bigger. One day some rich and famous people in big honkin cruise boats "re-discovered" St. Maartin and decided that they should make all this island their little closet. A few resorts later and a few deals with some cruise lines and next thing you know hundreds of thousands of people make it by the tiny island of St. Maartin each year. Tourism is the only source of income for the island so these people tend to be a bit more accommodating than many of the other islands.
Amy and I went on an excursion here in St. Maartin. We did the Rhino riders. What? Yea Rhino riders. These are cool check out link http://www.atlantisadventures.com/tour_info.php?site=12&tour=147
Here's how the excursion went: We got on a bus and a very informative driver told us the history of St. Maartin and how the French and Dutch did their best to "civilize" the island. It's from this driver that my version of history was formed. He was rather tour guide-ish with the way he led the tour but when he talked about how the French and Dutch basically raped the land you could sense a little bit of spite in there. Ok sorry, back to the rhinos. So we get to the place where we the rhinos are and we get a quick intro and rules of safety briefing by some guy who was built like a wall and had a great Russian accent. He was one of those guys that acted as the tour guide and complaint department...if you know what I mean?!? We get our briefing, life jackets and snorkel gear and then we head out on our boats. We got behind an older couple and for some reason they didn't believe the tour guide when he said the boats were like rhinos (tough and virtually untippable). So they decided they would drive their boat much slower than the guide. The rule was that we all go in a single line behind the guide and no one was allowed to pass. The older couple was right behind the guide followed by us. This drove me crazy considering the guide had to continuously slow down and circle while he waited for the rest of us. We finally got to our destination which was a little bay with black sand (volcanic) and shaped in semi-circular pattern. Because of it's shape they called it "Happy Bay"....I assume because it resembled a smile. We stop and our guide points out some people on the beach completely nude. He told us there was nothing to see there and he was right. Some old wrinkly guy and his mirror image wife...yuck! Some people have no shame! So we snorkel on the other side of the bay away from the "nudes" as the tour guide called them and unfortunately we don't see too many fish. We enjoyed the water and that's all that mattered. We get back on our rhinos and oh yea...Brian gets in front this time. We literally took flight this time. Those Rhino boats will fly ladies and gentlemen. We did a bunch of sharp turns and hit wakes and got some air. It was great! The old couple are probably still on the water looking for the rest of us. Ok, so we get back, say goodbye to the rhino's and get back on the bus and head for the ship. Oh wait, I forgot to mention that the guy the owned the dock and attached bar and grill was a New Yorker from Vegas who just "fell in love with the area". My take on this was that he was probably and ex mob guy or in the witness protection program. He just had that old mob look...you know what I mean?
So when we got back on the boat we showered and OF COURSE ate! It had been after all three or four hours and we were at least two meals down from our 10 times a day eating quota! This was our favorite excursion and we would recommend it to anybody. St. Maartin is a lovely island and the people seemed nice. If you go there, do the Rhinos and say hello to my new friend Vinny from Vegas!
Next blog will be from beautiful St. Lucia.......I think or maybe St. John. I'll look on the itinerary and get back with you.
Brian
posted by DallasHolts at
6:36 PM
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