Children's Crack!
WHAT? Yea, children's crack! There are drugs out there that almost every family household has and they may not know it. In fact, I've been working on a list of drugs that appear to be simple everyday things but are in fact "childrens crack". Here's two of the most notorious crack items found everywhere:
Water or H2O for our scientific friends - This little item is #1 on the "children's crack" list. Now I don't mean to drink....oh no I mean to play in. Today I turned on a sprinkler in our backyard and you would have thought I had threw a steak at a pack of wolves. My children were knee deep in sprinkler puddles within a half of a second. It's an instant high for my kids. You should see them near a pool...oh my it's so completely wacked out. If you've ever seen a buzzard fly in circles around their prey it's alot like that except the kids just circle the pool. They should have a 1-800# for parents with kids that are strung out on water.
Fruit Snacks - These little beauties could perhaps be #1 on the list but it all depends on if you have them or not. If you have them they can be your new best friend...that is if you're a parent. You can entice a child to do all kinds of things they wouldn't normally do with a pack of fruit snacks. You see manufacturers add a special chemical in fruit snacks called KK#2 or Kids Krack #2. KK#2 is basically sugar....ok it's all sugar but kids actually grow an addiction to it like crack addicts on the street. Pull out a bag of fruit snacks in front of a 1st grader and you'll actually see the child drool. Some even get the shakes...it's really sick. Lab mice on cocaine look calm compared to kids on fruit snacks.
If you child is addicted to Water or Fruit Snacks that's ok so is every other child in America. My kids are actually starting to freebase them. Well.....ok not really but you would think they were by how they react to them. If you can relate with me on these two "Children's Crack" items then please reply to me and let me know what your kids are addicted to. We can compare notes, cry on each other's blogs and if necessary go to a KK#2 Anonymous meeting.
Gotta go, one of my kids is getting the shakes.
BDH
Water or H2O for our scientific friends - This little item is #1 on the "children's crack" list. Now I don't mean to drink....oh no I mean to play in. Today I turned on a sprinkler in our backyard and you would have thought I had threw a steak at a pack of wolves. My children were knee deep in sprinkler puddles within a half of a second. It's an instant high for my kids. You should see them near a pool...oh my it's so completely wacked out. If you've ever seen a buzzard fly in circles around their prey it's alot like that except the kids just circle the pool. They should have a 1-800# for parents with kids that are strung out on water.
Fruit Snacks - These little beauties could perhaps be #1 on the list but it all depends on if you have them or not. If you have them they can be your new best friend...that is if you're a parent. You can entice a child to do all kinds of things they wouldn't normally do with a pack of fruit snacks. You see manufacturers add a special chemical in fruit snacks called KK#2 or Kids Krack #2. KK#2 is basically sugar....ok it's all sugar but kids actually grow an addiction to it like crack addicts on the street. Pull out a bag of fruit snacks in front of a 1st grader and you'll actually see the child drool. Some even get the shakes...it's really sick. Lab mice on cocaine look calm compared to kids on fruit snacks.
If you child is addicted to Water or Fruit Snacks that's ok so is every other child in America. My kids are actually starting to freebase them. Well.....ok not really but you would think they were by how they react to them. If you can relate with me on these two "Children's Crack" items then please reply to me and let me know what your kids are addicted to. We can compare notes, cry on each other's blogs and if necessary go to a KK#2 Anonymous meeting.
Gotta go, one of my kids is getting the shakes.
BDH
posted by DallasHolts at
11:02 PM
2 Comments:
Hi my name is Mitch and I'm addicted to Children's Crack! I need to bet on the water or my Sea Doo will rust.
You might think that H2O in liquid form is the only state for which kids go crazy. You would be very wrong, my friend. The next time you make a trip to the grocery store, check out the kids in the frozen food section. They're running up and down the aisle, opening all the glass doors and drawing pictures in the frost and laughing maniacally... The same way that they do when there is fog from the shower on the bathroom mirror. And don't pretend that you haven't noticed how kids flip out when it snows. It's a sad thing to watch, but don't let it get you down. You can't stop it. And hey... If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!!
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